GMR 181: How to Achieve Harmony in Financial Decisions as a Couple

Making financial decisions, especially under financial duress, can lead to frustration and big arguments with your spouse. Even when finances are good unity in your financial decisions can be challenging. In this episode, we discuss areas that are most prone to creating tension and ways you and your spouse can achieve harmony in all your financial decisions.

Show Notes

Financial decisions that create the most tension

  • Gift buying

  • Choosing where to vacation

  • Clothing

  • Hobbies

How people differ in their view of money

  • Sometimes it’s gender-specific, sometimes it’s not.

    • Men and women are different in what we value and what we care about.

  • Upbringing influence - family dynamic around money when growing up.

  • Modeling by parents - saver, or spender.

Suggestions for achieving harmony in your finances

  • Do it together

    • Embrace the mindset, all income is “our” income - it’s about building trust, which has a direct correlation to conflict. The more I trust you, the less likely I am to get upset when something goes wrong. When I trust, I assume the best and plan for the worst.

    • Create and use a spending plan that works for everyone (including the kids).

      • Provide a good lifestyle today.

      • Provide for future financial security - save and invest.

      • Incorporates categories that allow for the unique expression each of you has when using money.

    • Plan to spend some money to have experiences together - vacations, hobbies, etc.

      • When it’s something you both want, it’s easy to do and increases the feeling of unity.

      • Makes spending money fun, which when done together brings you closer. That’s different than when you spend money on individual interests, which is weird and doesn’t bring you closer.

    • Dream

      • Dreaming together about the future has a unifying effect. You’re painting a picture of what could be and it makes you more committed to doing whatever it takes to make it come true.

Resources

GMR Episode 61: Dating, Pre-marriage, and Money
GMR Episode 62: Pre-Marriage, Newly Married, and Money
GMR Episode 63: Long-Term Success in Marriage and Money

Improving Your FinancesLeo SaboFInancial Plan, Financial Unity with SpouseComment